October 20th

“There's a side of my personality that goes completely against the East Coast educated person and wants to be a pin-up girl in garages across America...there's a side that wants to wear the pink angora bikini!”
Mira Sorivona - American actress



A lot of people think I'm eccentric - personally I knnow that I'm totally normal. Eccentric would be a good thing to be but I still seem pretty normal to me.

The one thing that I would love to do is skydive - and yes I can understand why people think that's nuts. I've been once and it was without doubt the most amazing, fantastic, life-enhancing feeling ever! Leaving the plane and feeling the air rushing past my face, the noise of it, the exhileration... Then the sudden silence as the canopy opened and slowed me right down, leaving me time to spin around slowly and admire the panoramic view of the countryside. No other experience could come close.

If I ever have cash to spare I'll be straight down to Hinton to sign on for the accelerated freefall course there. Driving past there on the way to my Mother-in-law's is really hard. Especially on sunny blue days when you can see the canopies floating gently down to earth.

October 19th

"Tickled Pink"



Yes - even I laugh sometimes :D

October 18th

"In the PINK"



This was a very pink day! My Mum's wedding day earlier this year.

I've had fun this week looking through previous photos that I've posted here and realising that although I still cringe at some of them I now accept pictures of myself much more easily than I did six months ago,

Thanks Anna :)

October 17th

"I don't think I will ever get tired of wearing pink"
Emma Bunton



I hardly ever wear pink. I have one pink top (that's very comfortable and old) but that's about all.

Now if you take the white out and just leave red - I wear that MUCH more :)

October 16th

“Slow buds the pink dawn like a rose From out night's gray and cloudy sheath; Softly and still it grows and grows, Petal by petal, leaf by leaf”
Susan Coolidge



The promise of a new day. The promise of good things to come.
The hope that today might give you a chance to keep your promises to yourself, even if you didn't manage that yesterday.
The knowledge that no matter what, today will be spent (at least in part) with those whom you love. That there will be smiles and meals and time spent together. It might not be 'special' time but it will be time and if we are not too busy to notice them these moments will have a perfect charm - just for being the simple moments of our lives.

“Kiss your life. Accept it, just as it is. Today. Now. So that those moments of happiness you're waiting for don't pass you by.” Author unknown

Oh - in case anyone wondered - this is a photo of the last rose still blooming in my garden this year. I don't have many roses and they have been badly attacked by caterpillers this year but somehow this old rose just keeps getting stronger without any help for me.

October 15th

“The very pink of perfection”
Oliver Goldsmith



Too many people spend too much time striving for perfection. We cannot achieve it and still be human.

We worry about not living up to expectations, we worry about what others think of us, we worry about not being good enough. When, at the end of the day, we are who we are. The best we can do is to take time to notice the moments that we live in, to cherish the people that care for us and to leave gentle footprints on the spirit of this earth. Even the so-called perfect bloom of a flower has some small blemish on it - maybe a petal that is slightly smaller than it's neighbours, maybe a darkened spot where a raindrop dried. Perfection is not for any living being, but happiness in our human-ness is there for all if we can just learn to reach out and take hold of it.

'Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in'
Leonard Cohen

October 14th

“Almost all words do have color and nothing is more pleasant than to utter a pink word and see someone's eyes light up and know it is a pink word for him or her too”
Gladys Taber



I'm still struggling to keep up with posting - as I'm sure anyone who reads this blog will have noticed. I'm struggling to keep up with many things in my life right now but at the end all the things that don't get done will be forgotton and all the things that cannot be forgotton will be dealt with - somehow.

My life is changing a lot right now - it needed to for my own sanity, but unfortuantely that's not the easiest process to go through. It would be much easier if I lived alone and isolated from the difficulites of others but I don't - I live with five other people who all have needs and concerns of their own. I am a mother and a wife and, as such, my stability and care is so very needed every day to keep the spirits of these wonderful people buoyant and safe.

I'm borrowing a trick from Shirley this week - as it's inspirational week and I seem rather lacking in inspiration of my own...

Quote time:
'You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.' - Brian Tracy

October 10th

"Trouble and Strife"



I am a wife - and so very glad to be one. This guy makes my world safe and secure and happy. He gives it structure and meaning. He is the rock that grounds me and the sunshine that warms me. I would be totally lost without him.

October 9th

"Lets have a good cup o rosie lee"



Don't drink tea often but Starbucks is my treat every now and then. Sometimes on my own with a good book, sometimes with a friend or daughter. Extra shot latte always puts a smile on my face :)

October 8th

"A penny for your thoughts"



My thought have been splattered liberally across this blog for the last few months. Can't imagine anyone would ever want to pay for them, although it's been great reading some of the lovely comments from the other 365ers who read this.

And to day I get to be a queen for the day - yay!
What would I do if that could really happen? I'd love to think that I'd do something amazing and thoughtful that would benefit people in Britain but the truth of the matter is if I'd only got one single day as Queen I think I'd probably have a great time running madly through the corridors of Buckingham Palace, try on all her most glorious jewellery and pull faces at the Guards. Would they actually have to smile if the Queen ordered them to? That would be a fun thing to find out.

After all that serious work I'd just love to go to a huge posh banquet full of important elegant people who all had to be excruciatingly polite to me, no matter what I said or did. The potential for fun and mayhem is putting a grin on my face already...

October 7th

"Apples and Pears - Stairs"



These are our stairs!
They are the only way in and out of our boat right now. They are old and scruffy and desperately in need of painting but they were in Parbold when we first saw her, soggy and leaking and recently raised from the bottom of Bedfor Marina. They are pretty much the only thing we have that has been with her for longer than we have - and it's entirly possible that these steps were there when Parbold was still in use as a cargo boat.

One day I will build a proper, pretty staircase to get in and out of our home but until then these steps will do perfectly. Even after then I suspect these steps will still be in our boat by the back door, old and scruffy and much-loved by me, at least, as a symbol of how far Parbold has come.

October 1st (and one week ago)

Hold



You hold your children's hands for a short while, but their hearts forever.

My heart feels tied irrevocably to my girls no matter how near or far from me they are.
I pray that will never change.



September 24th

"What ever beauty may be, it has for its basis order, and for its essence unity”
Father Andre



The beauty of a flower always has the power to bring a smile, to take my breath away, to remind me of the strength and delicacy of nature. Passion flowers have the most amazing, most intricate design. If this flower had been designed by man it would seem unearthly in its beauty - noone would accept it as natural because its order and structure are so perfect and so inflexible from bloom to bloom.

Any accidental mutation of genetic material that can lead to the existance of such a fantastical flower has to the most unlikely and miraculous of accidents.

September 30th (+ one week ago)

OK - so I'm a week behind so this week you get double posts. Seems like the easiest way to catch up without tryingto make myself do too much at once.

September 30th

Care



I do try not to care, but it drives me crazy.
When did I become so old and tired-looking????


September 23rd

“Our happiness is completely and utterly intertwined with other people: family, friends, neighbors and the woman who you hardly notice who cleans your office”
Eric Weiner; author - national public radio correspondent



These two girls of mine can fight and snarl at each other with real passion but the older they grow the closer they grow. It is wonderful to see each will wrap her warmth and gentleness around her sister when it is most needed. I hope that, for them, happiness can always be found intertwined in a sister's arms.

The rest of Abba week

September 22nd

"What's the name of the game
does it mean anything to you
what's the name of the game
can you feel it the way I do

Tell me please
'cause I have to know
I'm a bashful child
beginning to grow"



Soon I will plant these daffodil bulbs and I know that they will grow strong and flower into beauty. They have lain dormant since they last flowered but their strength and vitality is only hiding,not gone forever.

As they grow into new life and beauty so will I, because as time moves on we either grow stronger with its passing or we wither and die on the inside. I have been small and brown and insignificant for too long now - my flowering time is well overdue.

September 21st

"Slipping through my fingers
all the time
I try to capture
every minute
the feeling in it
slipping through my fingers
all the time
do I really see what's
in her mind
each time I think
I'm close to knowing
she keeps on growing
slipping through my fingers
all the time"

When did this.....



become this...




September 20th

"I don't wanna talk
about the things we've gone through
though it's hurting me
now it's history
I've played all my cards
and that's what you've done too
nothing more to say
no more ace to play

The winner takes it all
the loser standing small
beside the victory
that's her destiny"



September 19th

I was a woman never thinking of others
and my life was so lonely
didn't care for anybody
but then I happened to meet
a begging man in the street
as I turned down his praying
I heard someone saying: "ah -

Treat him well, he is your brother
you might need his help one day
we depend on one another
love him that's the only way
on the road that we're going
we all need words of comfort and compassion
treat him well, he is your brother
love him that's the only way"

September 18th

"I have a dream
a song to sing
to help me cope
with anything
if you see the wonder
of a fairy tale
you can take the future
even if you fail
I believe in angels
something good in
everything I see
I believe in angels
when I know the time
is right for me
I'll cross the stream
I have a dream"



Seeing someone's dreams die as always a sad thing.

Seeing someone you love turn their back on thier own dreams through stubborn pride is truly heart-breaking.

September 17th

"You can dance, you can jive
having the time of your life
see that girl, watch that scene
dig in the Dancing Queen"



Autmun is a perfect dancing time.

I love watching the thistledown seeds dancing though the air. (I hope they don't land on my lawn and grown tall and strong when I'm not looking).

I love watching my daughter chase the thistledown 'faires' so she can catch them and save them in her fairy jar.

I love watching the sycamore helicoptors on their spiralling dance to a new life - how come it's so impossible to get them to spin like that again once they have fallen to the earth?

I love dancing through the crispy fallen leaves in the woods and around the lake. Soon they will be there waiting for me and my dancing feet...
Soon....

September 16th

This week I have been inspired by the hit musical, blockbusting movie, Mamia Mia!!!! Enjoy.....

"Tonight the
Super Trouper
lights are gonna find me
shining like the sun
smiling, having fun
feeling like a number one"
Abba
What has made you feel like a Super Trouper today?




Super Trouper? Me?
Not today.

Right now good days are mixed with miserable days. Today was definately a miserable day. I just can't raise any enthusiasm for anything. I haven't had any coffee since 6am though and that does seem to make a difference to my mood - and how silly does that sound?

PS - thanks for the txts reminding me to make coffee, Jess.
I love you too <3 <3 <3

September 15th (and before)

"And will you succeed? Yes indeed, yes indeed!
Ninety-eight and three-quarters percent guaranteed."



There are new things ahead of me this autumn: a new job, a first real job. I have a lot of hopes that it will lead to something great and exciting. Will it be what I want it to be? Who knows...

It will certainly give me training and experience - with that and a little hard work I can go anwhere I choose. I can succeed if I give myself the chance!



September 14th
"If you never did, you should.
These things are fun, and fun is good."





September 13th
"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened."



The summer holidays are over and they barely even happened: the weather was awful and we didn't get to go away anywhere. We did have some good days though and a trip to the zoo for Katheryn's birthday was definately a very good day!



September 12th
"From there to here, and here to there,
funny things are everywhere."



How did I get here? Where will I go?
Will I have fun there? I don't realy know.
There's one thing for certain, for good or for bad
It's time to be me now, which should make me glad!

September 11th

"Today you are you, that is truer than true.
There is no one alive who is youer than you."
Dr. Seuss



I don't feel me-er than me...
I feel empty....

September 10th

"You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself, any direction you choose. "
Dr. Seuss



The only way to go is forwards. It's the start of a new year - well, a new school year. And coming from a family of teachers that seems to be the year that means most to me deep down inside. The girls are growing up so fast - three at secondary school now, one in her final year there - and it's time for me to move on too. I start a new job in about a month. I'm starting right at the bottom but there's loads of room for me to learn and hopefully to find something that challenges me over the next few years.

Isn't the world a fun place when it's full of possibilites and hope?

September 9th

A new week of quotes, and I have been inspired by the magic words of Dr Seuss! If you have children or grandchildren, I am sure you will be familiar with his words of wisdom.

"Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting. So... get on your way."
Dr. Seuss



These are my new mountain climbing shoes!
They may not look like mountain-climbing shoes, they may not be practical for any mountains that you might be thinking of, but seeing as my mountain is liking me, my life and who I am these shoes work very well. I used to wear bright colours all the time, I used to wear pretty things, impractical things and occasionally even girly things. Over the last 15 years children and boats have turned muy wardrobe into a boring mix of practical drab clothes that I hate. These shoes are the start of fun, self -respect and 'me' time! It's going to be a hard steep slope to climb but I so want to see the top of this particular mountain.

Let the Good Times roll!!!!

September 3rd

Lesson 3:



The three oldest girls went back to school today after the long summer holidays. Just Emily at home with me today and it was good. We rarely get time with just the two of us.

September 2nd

Lesson two:



Getting all the books off the floor of the children's bedroom has made lots of difference. The built-in shelves are no where near ready but someone else's cast-off bookshelves will certainly be a God-send until they are.

September 1st

Started a month long class with Shimelle today: it's called Learn Something New Every Day. Here's today's lesson...



The hidden journalling under the photo reminds me that his photo was chosen as one of the finallists in this August's Photo competition. Thanks Anna for choosing me and also for introducing me to the elegance of bokeh. I hope it takes me a lifetime to appreciate it fully :)

August 11th (and before)

"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could say, I used everything you gave me...
Erna Bomback



I wish I had more time in my life to play music. I watch my daughters practice every day and miss doing so myself. At least helping them to enjoy music is something I can do right now - there will be time aplenty to cultivate my own talents when my girls are grown and flying free.

August 10th

"Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication."
Leonardo da Vinci



August 9th

"Satisfaction lies in the effort, not in the attainment, full effort is full victory."
Ghandi Mahatma



You have to be kidding me!!!

If I spend ages trying to do something and it turns out badly then no way do I feel any satisfaction whatsoever in the effort I put in. Satisfaction only lies in the effort if the result is one that makes you smile.

August 8th

“Appreciation...acknowledges the presence of good wherever you shine the light of your thankful thoughts.”
Alan Cohen - author




August 7th

"Everybody can be great...because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. you only need a heart full of grace, a soul generated by love.”
Martin Luther King, Jr. (1929-68) - American civil rights leader





August 6th

"The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.”
Mohandas Gandhi (1869-1948) - Indian political and spiritual leader





August 5th



“If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain. If I can ease one life the aching, Or cool one pain, Or help one fainting robin Unto his nest again, I shall not live in vain.”
Emily Dickinson (1830-1886) - poet

If I can ease the hurts of my children and help them to grow up with the strength to resist the pains that life throws at them then my life will not have been lived in vain.

If I can make my husband's life an happier and more peaceful place then my life will not have been lived in vain.

August 4th (and a bit)

The summer holidays are heare and the kids are at home so blogging is defientely a weekly thing for now.



August 4th

“No person ever ended his eyesight by looking on the bright side.”
Zig Ziglar (b. 1926) - author, motivational speaker



On the bright side:

I might have a new job that has some potential to not only earn some money but to provide some challenges and motivate me to reach higher. just one more interview to pass.....

After ages of getting nowhere with the boat the kitchen is beginning to look like a place I could be proud of owning soon

Jess is away and I miss her. I've not heard from her at all in tha last week so shee must be happy there - mu mum laways said she never worried if she didn;t hear from me 'cos I only called when something was bothering me. I'm hoping that holds true for Jess but i'm pretty sure it does. Bet she's having the time of her life!

August 3rd

"Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams"
Ashley Smith (b. 1978) - author, speaker





August 2nd

Happiness... is not a destination: it is a manner of traveling. Happiness is not an end in itself. It is a by-product of working, playing, loving and living.
Haim Ginott



Yup - still working on the kitchen :)



August 1st

"Consult not your fears but your hopes and your dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed in, but with what it is still possible for you to do.”
Pope John XXIII (1881-1963) - 261st Pope of the Roman Catholic Church



Parbold had been sunken for about two years when we bought her. The only condition that Iain made regarding my daft idea to buy her was that I found a dock capable of fixing her and a way to get her there. It took me 24 hours to get both sorted. Since then life has moved on so much. She spent exactly a year to the day in dry dock being re-bottomed and made water-tight and then another eight months having her cabin built.

Some days I think that taking on Parbold was the most stupid decision I ever made but other days i *know* that I have the patience and the strength of will to make her into the beautiful home that she is in my dreams. It may be taking me longer than I expected but I know that her potential will be reached. She deserves no less. And in reaching her potential I will be unleashing mine too.



July 31st

"Listen to the Musn't's child, Listen to the Don't's. Listen to the Shouldn't's, the Impossibles, the Won't's. Listen to the Never Haves, then Listen close to me. ANYthing can happen, child, ANYthing can Be.”
Shel Silverstein (1930-1999) - poet, songwriter, musician





July 30th

"Most of us, swimming against the tides of trouble the world knows nothing about, need only a bit of praise or encouragement - and we will make the goal.”
Jerome P. Fleishman




So true!!
How much more would I have done if only to make those I love happier.
When those around me seem content with things as they are who am I to change things?



July 29

“Appreciation is a wonderful thing. It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well.”
Voltaire (1694-1778) - writer, satirist, author, humanist



Today I actually really appreciate my life. Things are good and life is full of unexplored possibilities.

July 26th

Pisces - Fish - Aquamarine - Waterlily



I don't know any Pisces people but while I was browsing around looking for a pretty picture ar somthing interesting about Pisces I found a website about the world's largest jigsaw. It has 24,ooo pieces and when it's finished it is 168.5 in x 61.8 in (14ft 0.5 in x 5ft. 1.8in). The finished picture is the one below but if you want to see it in more details you can look at it here. It is an absolutley gorgeous thing but who has time (or space) to finish such a monster. Maybe I'll put it on my list of things to do when I retire 'cos I know how much free time you retired ladies have to spare - lol.

July 25th

Aquarius - water - Amethyst - Fruit Trees



Aquarius - that'd be my Mum then. And my Nan. Not that they would ever have liked being grouped together in any way whatsoever. Two formidable ladies, two big influences in my life, both strong, charismatic and more than a little scary. They just never got on, at all.

I had a wonderful relationship with my mother for the whole of my childhood - she was my strength, my foundation. Her love and belief in me let me know that I could do anything I wanted, be anything I wanted and gave me the strength to follow my dreams.

If I could do one impossible thing before breakfast it would have been to allow my Mum to heal the rifts that grew so deep between her and her mother so that she too could have know the support and love that was there for her - even though she could never see it herself. My Nan really did adore her but had absolutely no idea how to show her that.