Wayne Gretzky (b. 1961) - retired professional ice hockey player
But what shots do I take these days?
When I was younger I did lots, achieved lots and thought that the world was my oyster. Now my biggest achievement seems to be finding the kitchen surfaces and the living room floor on the same day.
For the last 16 years my world has become increasingly smaller as my childrena have taken up more and more of my life. However, now I see them becoming independent people. My eldest will soon be away from our home; this summer she will be living and working away for the holidays. Knowing that she will come back for her last year of school helps and I am so pleased and proud that she is taking this step for herself. The others won't be far behind as the years seem to fly past so quickly and I wonder what I will have left of myself when they are grown.
Who am I without them?
Who would I have been without them?
What shots would I have made?
What shots would I have scored?
More importantly is there still a chance for me to take some of those shots and score? And which shots should I even aim for? A happy life, definately, but what would that mean on a practical level? I can't just sit home for the next twenty years until Iain retires and we can have fun together. Can I actually live my life at home on my own filling my time with gardening and crafts and find enoungh in that? Could I actually get a job that fulfils me and challenges me? A string of little part-time jobs is my lot at the moment and that is not enough to inspire any prospective employer to take me on.
Bah - maybe sometimes I just think too much and worry too much.
What will be will be and when it is my time to find 'my thing' it will turn up. I do believe that the world has balance if you're just prepared to let go of everything and trust in Karma.
5 comments:
Love the pic! And you're right, don't plan, wait and see what opportunities are placed in front of you, may be something you never dreamt of!
Sounds as if you are beginning to worry about when the children have left home, but don't you will find you and will fulfill you when the time come.
Yes you are thinking too hard:) and worrying too much. try and just enjoy life now and reflect on what you have achieved which is a home and children, all very important
I agree whole heartedly with the last paragraph
great pic and fab journaling
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